September 24th, 2008
|03:07 pm - Submitted for your approval...|
I've been inspired recently by a good documentary on the life of Rod Serling and the Twilight Zone to write up an idea I had for the series. It all came about from a quote by Donald Featherstone, a founding figure of miniature wargaming, when somebody asked him about the morality of simulating warfare. He recognized the irony but drew a sharp contrast between reality and gaming by noting "there are no lead widows in wargaming." Those ideas and that quote got me to thinking and the result is what lies behind the cut.
Current Location: Home
Current Mood: creative
Current Music: Crickets outside
July 14th, 2008
|02:38 pm - Reading|
Add Band of Heroes (WWII tactical board game rules) and Chain Reaction 2.0 (miniature rules for turn of century to now and beyond).
July 1st, 2008
|11:15 am - Reading? List|
I've decided to list out the stuff I read as I read it in the course of a year just to keep track. Mostly it's rules for wargames and roleplaying but there might be a few honest to goodness books in there.
1. Red Russia - The Russian Civil War 1918-1921
2. Millennium Wars - Iraq
3. Millennium Wars - Air War
4. Millennium Wars - Kashmir
5. Millennium Wars - Ukraine
6. Millennium Wars - Korea
7. Millennium Wars - America
8. Defiant Russia - The War Against Nazi Agression
9. Mark H. Walker's Lock n' Load - Band of Heroes
10. Price of Freedom - Roleplaying in Occupied America
11. Nightlife - Splatterpunk roleplaying
12. Arrowflight - The Edge of Fantasy
LOL geez from my reading list it looks like I'm some sort of raving right wing conservative. Actually I lean to the left from a normally centrist position.
Coming up 1632, NATO the Next War, Not One Step Back, Swift and Bold, Northern Crown, Nyambe - Ancestral Vaults and Red Vengence.
Current Location: Morning Room
Current Mood: content
Current Music: Toto - Africa
August 3rd, 2007
|12:21 pm - Scots and Irish and Germans and English etc. Davenports and Smiths|
This will be a very long post and because I only post once a millenia I've never retained how to do a cut (though I've been shown several times) so my apologies.
I'm 37 and both my parents are gone now. It's a hell of a thing to be this young and at the same time to have lived this long. Then again my family does have a tendency to live in aging ways. Brother and sister are in their forties pushing 50 and look it (though there is always a light in their eyes). To make sense of things I've almost continually mused about who I am and what makes me, Me. Its been an ongoing search. I've had a lot of cues and picked up and cobbled other things out of family stories and research into my ancestors. But what I know now is that it all really boils down to one thing that lies behind both the family stories and the historical research and that is, Memory.
I have always loved the Scots and the Irish strains within me. I've always identified strongly with them (though like most ex-pats they don't always identify very strongly with me and dismiss me and other romantic American Scots as "too damned sentimental" a damning phrase indeed coming from a real Scot). But love them I do still. I read a book about the Canadian-Scottish experience callled "No Great Mischief" and it was a real eye opener for me. I knew about the '45 and studied some Scottish history even rejoiced when Scotland managed to regain a seperate parliment and long for a time when Scotland is independent but I never saw how families looked like from that perspective.
The book was like reading about my own family. Not in every particular mind you but the feel of this family, its archetypes I could see so easily in my own family. I could even find the role I play in the family in the stories that this author told of his own families' experiences. So this came home to me again when I went home to bury Dad and realized that in much of who they are my family are Scots. Blunt, tactless, opinionated, vulgar, crude yes, but also honest, loving, faultlessly loyal, proud (in the best way), gentle, forgiving, intelligent and worldly wise. I say Scots but also there is the Irish strain too full of fun and mirth (if not sometimes a little wild) even a natural musical talent that leads the least talented (ahem Me) to sing and dance as we go about our daily lives sometimes. We also keep grudges, drink a bit too much, get into fights but still mend fences too, and wish what is best for our kith and kin and we have a very broad idea of who our kin are. Every member who can trace the common ancestors back four or five or more generations is kin. The rest of my family isn't as deliberate of thinking on this as I am. Everyone who they know are related to us but are unsure of how becomes a "cousin" and that's that. If asked you help this person you treat their problems as common cause. I know now how blessed I have been to have had This family as my own. How it has cradled me as I have had to live in sometimes a cold, hard world. I am NOT a man who has no one to stand up for him and no one related to me is that way either for if asked I will cross the country on their account and stand beside them. They have leant me character and suppourt and made me a much better man. Even while, a smile as I think this, they might be the kind of people who could cause a hulabaloo at a White House Dinner. But even in this I am proud of them. Yes, proud of blunt tactlessness. Why? Because they have never really learned how to BS. How to lie continually and get ahead at it. Everything that makes me sick of the world and how it works is in many ways alien to them. We may be blunt but you can absolutely trust our opinion to be truthful. You can trust us, because our character (perhaps unwisely) is always out there in the open for everyone to see. I love them dearly and swell with pride when my wife (the one with the demure, religious family) calls them amazing people. Even though there were times when my family were recalling their wild and stupid days of their youth and I could see inside my wifes mind as she was agog at how risky, violent, and at the same time, not really malicious my family could be.
Now I have been talking about the Scots and Irish, I could add in the Welsh the German and others too and this would be the Davenport (Mom's) side of the family. Now many of the same kind of behaviors I saw in the Smith's side as well. Mostly they were English (I'm guessing, ever try to do geneology on the name Smith?) and also Swedish. They were big people. More quiet, I think, than Mom's. But they were big tough Swedes I tell you. And yet paradoxically their hearts could be more tender. Less apt to hold grudges. I remember a nephew of Dad's showing up at the house looking for his brother. They had been in what my family calls "a real knock down, drag out" fistfight. Yet here he was looking for the brother wanting to apologize already. It had only been a few hours. I knew you shouldn't be fighting (probably from Mom's side they knew decorum better even when they couldn't always adhere to it) but I was touched that care and love can't really be erased by thoughtless actions. But the quiet and the toughness and the tenderness really came out in Dad, and I finally realized what it had given me when it came time for me to Eulogize him at his funeral. While Mom's family had given me Religion, and I do treasure it, Dad gave me faith. It is said by some psychologists that young men get their first real ideas about God from their fathers. Dad, in that mixture of attributes stood up to all the world could throw at his family. To be sure there were many, many good times but it was in how he was always there in the bad that I saw love very clearly. You would never face the worst alone. I would see him, staring out the window shouldering some burden that had been laid on our family and he never withdrew. He didn't turn his face from us. I would see those manly eyes tearing up and if I went to him to hug him he wouldn't try to hide those tears he would just reach down and pick me up. That and many others times I knew that Dad loved me and I wasn't alone. Now I know that I could make the leap to a God, to a Ground of all being that cares for me and won't desert me because I saw that in my father first.
Indeed it's hard to believe Dad and Mom are both gone now. It is hard to think that all that I have left are memories. But these memories have great power and with them and through them and in them I see Mom and Dad in my brother and my sister, my aunts and uncles, my cousins and nieces and nephews. I see Mom and Dad reflected in my ancestors that I have searched for. I see Mom and Dad in who I am. In my intellect and my questioning Mom lives in me. In the moment when my wife says to me that she believes that I will always be there for her, my Dad lives in me. And yet more I feel them near me now wherever I go. Indeed it is hard to be this young and to be alone but I will never really be alone as long as I have all these memories around me.
June 14th, 2007
I is in ur jurnl, makn a entry.
May 26th, 2006
|04:21 pm - For Renoir Girl..the rest of the Orientation film|
I might do it if I can catch up and remain interested
I've apparently missed a lot of clues already
8:30 AM me: Really? Huh. Hey, I wonder if the numbers are a way the Widmore/Hanso people keep track of various things? It's code for the project itself..so since Hurley used them someone said "The project needs money...make these numbers win the lottery."
8:31 AM Amy: OOOOOH
that's VERY GOOD
And then they discovered that he wasn't related to the project, so they put him on the plane to get him involved
8:34 AM me: Partly and started effing over his life to dissuade him from using the numbers again...However, if this is correct desmond did not cause the crash of the plane by screwing up and not putting in the numbers..there is no way the Hanso/Widmore people could have predicted that...
8:36 AM Amy: Kelvin (who I thought was Emmett for some reason) could have lured Desmond out on purpose. He used to be special ops... he might know how to trick somebody into following. All he had to do was keep Desmond out of the hatch long enough to make sure there would be system failure.
If he'd let Desmond go out on his own, it would have been less believable that it happened 'by mistake'
8:38 AM --bathroom break
8:39 AM me: K
8:40 AM Why would he show Desmond how to do the reset thing? With the key? How does that figure in?
8:47 AM Amy: back. I think he really was drunk. I think that scene worked on a very transparent level.
8:52 AM me: Okay..
8:53 AM Do me a favor call me sometimes..Lobelia is being very garrulous today..
8:54 AM Of course she just stopped..
8:55 AM You know what gets me..she has these very heartwarming stories...and yet they don't resonate much with me when she tells them...but some part of me thinks "Hey that could be sweet if someone else told it."
9:10 AM Amy: I'm sorry
9:11 AM I got shanghai'd by a good-bye party
9:12 AM I just tried to call, but there was no answer.
9:13 AM from Hanso: For forty years, the
foundation has offered grants to worthy experiments designed to further
the evolution of the human race and provide technological solutions to
the most pressing problems of our time.
9:14 AM grants to worthy experiments
9:19 AM me: Hmmm
9:20 AM Amy: so, "The Others" could be a group that got a grant from Hanso. Hanso offers support in the form of food drops and cash, but they aren't actually running the Dharma Initiative any more.
me: That doesn't ring true...Too much of a setup to just let it go...
And then let yahoos take it over...
9:21 AM Amy: In fact, Hanso might never have run the Dharma Initiative. They might have only funded it, and the new grant recipients are just using the facility.
9:22 AM me: From the films it seemed like the founder of the Hanso corporation had a personal stake in it..
9:24 AM The idea that the Dharma Initiative ended, though, and the facility is just being used by a new group that portrays itself as 'the others,' that all seems plausible to me. There are problems with it though, in terms of the violence. It's a group with ethics I can't figure out.
9:32 AM me: I definitely agree with that..I have this feeling that something went very wrong between Widmore - Hanso the project became a liabiltiy and was cancelled but someone is siphoning money off to keep it going..limping along...that would explain the ethics of the group a bit..they don't have much oversight and are operating against..Hey, what if the "good" part of the Hanso - Widmore thing found out recently that Dharma was still operating...Maybe through Hurley and decided to have showdown with ...ta ta dum..the evil twin..in the fallout they have to tie up all the loose ends...all the lostaways are put on Oceanic and exiled..but they are provided for...
9:33 AM The lostaways are loose ends because in one way or another this failed Dharma thing has touched their lives significantly...they just haven't figured it out yet..
9:34 AM Amy: "The Others" ARE the evil twin of Hanso and the Dharma Initiative
me: Oooh..what if the Dharma thing uncovered some actual potential within humanity for Psychic power and they didn't like the result? Then some of the experiments went home and the "powers" started to manifest themselves...
9:35 AM Amy: huh
so we'd find out that, for instance, Jack's father had actually been a Dharma Initiative participant, back in the day
me: Good one about the "Others" yeah a detective hunt..but they must have allies back home so they can still get shipments of food.
9:36 AM Or wrote some of the parameter for the Medical experiments?
Which is why the ghost of Jack's father was on the island
9:37 AM it really is there--perhaps in a more figurative sense than anybody imagined
it's a more powerful presence in the figurative than it is in the literal
me: Yeah psychic projection..
9:38 AM Jack's Dad has such a arrogance because maybe he found out something about himself in the Initiative...but couldn't really handle it and started drinking..
Amy: The cloud of black smoke is capable of showing people's lives to them... perhaps it took the form of Jack's father
i like that, too. Very good.
9:39 AM me: omg...what if this is a superheroesque origin story and the lostaways are the superheroes?
The first generation of Mutants?
9:40 AM Amy: or the second generation that just isn't aware yet. Walt as third generation and, thus, most obvious
9:41 AM their parents all having been part of the dharma initiative
which explains how/why Claire and Jack as (as yet unknown) brother and sister would be there
man... Locke is old for this scenario, but his Dad... his dad... his dad was very wealthy...
9:42 AM it could be. His dad might have been among the first...
me: But it was harsh on your constitution so his Dad's kidney's failed
9:43 AM Amy: oooohhhh
9:45 AM damn
9:46 AM their 'superhuman' powers are why they survived the plane crash
9:47 AM me: And why the black woman said to Locke "Both you and I know it won't take that long"
Amy: ah, but that's a question I've been thinking about awhile
why weren't they healed before they returned to the island?
9:48 AM me: The electromagnetism stimulates their powers?
Amy: It's a different spin, of course. Before this conversation, the question was "Why did the island heal them." Okay.. that could be. They're triggered by that, somehow.
It also triggers Jack into Googley-eyed rage.
Amy: That's his superpower. He's FURIOUS MAN
9:49 AM me: BTW we didn't plan out dinner tonight?
9:50 AM Amy: This is really helping me flesh out my list of questions
9:52 AM me: The pilot...remember the pilot he was in bad shape after the crash he wasn't part of the Initiative or anything...
9:53 AM Amy: RIGHT
er, right. Capslock
9:54 AM and just to make sure he didn't turn into a fly in the ointment, the black cloud perceived the security threat and took him out of the way.
who is Danielle?
me: The black cloud also sniffs DNA like a dog to see "who belongs" so Locke might have a weaker connection..
9:55 AM Who is Danielle? Uh...
9:57 AM Her ship picked up on the numbers signal and followed it to the island
they were scientists
9:59 AM me: Another Hurleyesque episode of stumbling on the "forbidden" numbers...I have this idea that the others have been continuing the experiments by getting fresh blood from time to time...the lostaways are a big surprise to them because unlike the other castaways the lostaways "belong" on the island..
10:00 AM Amy: So you think Danielle doesn't have an off-island connection to the Lostaways
10:01 AM But Desmond did
10:02 AM me: Haven't seen one yet..but wait no..her child was taken...however alex doesn't seem happy...
Maybe her husband had a connection...normal people are driven insane by the island...
10:03 AM Amy: no...
normal people are made sick by it, unless they get the shots
me and my html
10:04 AM Anybody who survives is connected.
or getting injections
10:05 AM me: Right...right...Claire's baby is also 3rd gen..wonder what they will be able to do...
10:06 AM The psychics kid..the one who resurrected? Was 3rd gen too...
10:07 AM Amy: AH!
10:08 AM why weren't they on the plane? The psychic was a Dharma employee.
He may have negotiated his daughter out of the new plan
10:10 AM me: Or hidden...maybe what he could do freaked him out....he became a charlatan..and then Claire blew past all that...and he was freaked out again...the people still running the Initiative wanted all 3rd gens badly so he traded his daughter for Claire's baby...but he KNEW that to leave someone like Claire's baby in the world was incredibly dangerous especially if...the genetic mother wasn't around...
10:12 AM Amy: nod The child would need the guidance of its experimental-second-generation parent.
maybe the psychic isn't usually psychic, but he has a connection to anyone connected with the experiments, can recognize them almost instantly.
10:18 AM me: My idea is that he was really freaked out by what he could do...hid it left the island and became cynical to deny it...all the Hanso know is that he can identify...Oh my...he wanted no official investigation because then Hanso would find out about his daughter...they don't know about her..yet.
10:21 AM Amy: AH - RIGHT!
10:22 AM He isn't actually a charlatan. That was a fiction made up for Eko.
He actually has a gift and knows he has a gift, but he has learned how to seem to just 'read people' well just in case.
10:23 AM me: Yep...this also explain why the other's seem so..sure of themselves..they have knowlege of what they can do..they have evolved..
Amy: So Hanso didn't have to recruit him to put Claire on the plane. He just knew.
10:24 AM So he's completely in hiding, or believes he is.
me: Right...or Hanso believe he doesn't have any gits..
Amy: I've posted a list to one of the LOST communities to see if I can get help filling in some of my swiss cheese memory with info about the parents.
10:25 AM me: I never saw the connections between before but every 3rd generation kid can do amazing shit..
What if Charlie is a very old 3rd Generation or..omg..what if Claire's baby is 4th generation?
Amy: what did aaron do?
10:26 AM what did Charlie do?
me: He had those visons...
Amy: so did Locke and Eko
me: Mmmm...We saw Charlie's vision
Amy: and Boone
10:27 AM me: Okay fine...
So Charlie is second gen...
Amy: I don't know... no way of knowing yet
me: Probably then.
Amy: but these do fit
10:28 AM me: But Claire seems really young so her child could be the first 4th Gen..but then again she hasn't done anything..
10:29 AM Amy: you know, even of what I can remember of the parents, it's a little suspicious
lots of illness and death on the one hand, plenty of money and power on the other.
not necessarily dividing the parents into neat groups like that, but there aren't a lot of just average people
10:30 AM not that many people on TV are just average or come from average homes
10:31 AM me: Some of the parents didn't react well to the experiments...some learned to use them..and maybe it depended on which experiments they were subjected to..some experiments worked, some just broke people...
10:33 AM Amy: that would certainly fit our theory
10:34 AM me: The only thing that doesn't work is that Claire has exhibited nothing extra ordinary...stuff only happens to her...no visions, no voices nothing
10:35 AM Amy: maybe it was her boyfriend, then, and not her, and I was wrong about it needing the care of a 2nd generation parent?
but that doesn't fit the Jack/s father scenario
maybe we just haven't had an opportunity to see Claire's gifts.
10:37 AM me: Maybe..her gift is to not be affected by the crap on the island as much...that's why she was necessary to be with a 4th gen child so badly..
10:41 AM Amy: I think I'll just wait to see what happens with her. She might turn out to be incredibly gifted... just not sufficiently challenged yet. She's been really protected because of the baby.
she did get kidnapped, but we know that her kidnapper meant her no harm and got her to believe that she was in no danger
10:42 AM me: Yeah...though Charlie's vision kind of sets him up as the baby's protector..
Amy: as soon as she was actually in danger, Alex stepped in and protected her.
at least he sees himself that way
10:43 AM me: Because Alex was in a similar situation..and Claire was drugged/manipulated...
10:44 AM I believe Charlie really was called to be the baby's protector..
10:45 AM Amy: ok
ooh, I'm starting to get responses about the parents
lookie: There is hinting that Locke's dad might be the con artist that Sawyer's mom had been sleeping with.
10:46 AM me: Oh..wow...yeah...that makes sense...
10:50 AM There is a strain, a geneology...Locke's dad was good with "reading" people and conning them with charisma...and his descendent are too...Sawyer became a con man...and Locke had this whole "I'm together and I know thing" going on but it was their GIFTS..they are both really flawed...Sawyer didn't see himself being played when he executed the guy in Austrailia...and Locke isn't as together as he thought he was..
10:54 AM Amy: right
here's another one: faked his own death to get away from a debt to some shady characters
me: Oh my...
Amy: But I believe the shady characters
10:55 AM me: Locke's dad was on the run form Hanso
And sold out his son..knowing they would be more interested in him?
10:59 AM Amy: could be
11:00 AM I'm only getting a small portion of my LJ comments...
11:01 AM I find a lot more if I look at the post
11:02 AM me: I should look at that.
11:05 AM Amy: here's my post: http://community.livejournal.com/lost_geek/205160.html
11:10 AM Amy: and Locke's mother was in a mental hospital - possibly same as Hurley's
11:12 AM interesting quote from Wikipedia: While the troubling parental relationships of these individuals have been the most explored, nearly all the protagonists have had serious difficulties with their families. In many cases, the ways in which the survivors dealt with these relationships led to their being on the island.
11:13 AM ah, comments are starting to come through.
11:21 AM me: Wow are they
Amy: I just meant they're finally coming to my e-mail
11:22 AM I already read all these on the post page
11:24 AM me: Ahh..the Wikipedia is a gold mine...
11:27 AM Locke knew that it was his destiny to go to that island. He just hasn't figured out why
but WHO HE IS is intimately connected with that place.
it's just that, what the relationships are... how everything is connected and what it means--those things elude him.
11:30 AM me: Ever wonder if Locke is a biblical character? I'm thinking Eko as John the Baptist and Locke as Jesus...things only get really screwed up when he tries to contest Jack for Control or "get" with Claire...those things are not for him...
I mean him beating on the hatch was a real Gethsemane moment..
Amy: LOL, yeah
11:31 AM if that's the case, then the epiphany moment should involve Locke, Eko, and... the skies opening up......!
me: Uh...they did..
11:32 AM I was originally going to say "water" when suddenly I saw that moment down in the hatch
I wonder if the talking bird was there?
11:33 AM me: What if that was the crucifixion? Eko is dead, Locke comes back 3 days later..
11:34 AM Amy: could be. But John the Baptist wasn't there for the crucifixion.
11:35 AM me: Yeah well..not a direct allegory here..
How's desmond play into this?
11:36 AM Amy: no idea
I was just thinking about the moment of epiphany at the Baptism... heavens opened up, dove flies down, a voice from heaven says "This is my son in whom I am well pleased"
me: You know..it makes almost more sense for Desmond to be the Jesus figure...Locke..locke is the devil...When Eko tells them Desmond reconsiders and then is willing to sacrifice himself because he knows he is truly loved
11:37 AM Amy: yeah, that does work better
11:38 AM me: Uhm..this hasn't really jelled yet..but the light in the sky is really unmistakeable...there is something going on with those three...If Claire and Kate go to the hatch though in 3 days we will know who is supposed to be whom...
11:39 AM Amy: lol
especially after Charlie's vision
11:40 AM me: Oh..right..hmmm..right..
11:42 AM Joseph really isn't the father of the baby...hmmm...
Lots of shifting perceptions going on here...
11:45 AM Amy: heh, yeah
Well, they do make sure the show operates on several levels
11:46 AM And you're right, I think Charlie does stand in for Joseph, at least in his vision
11:47 AM me: Who's the father of Claire's baby really?
11:50 AM Amy: right
Right now he has "NPC" status
11:52 AM me: Hmmm
March 15th, 2006
Big surprise here.
You're 70% Irish
You're very Irish, and most likely from Ireland.
(And if you're not, you should be!)
Maybe the other 30% is pure Scottish.
February 9th, 2006
|12:15 pm - Cartoon Fallout|
I've been having the most interesting interchange with a coworker over the "Danish Cartoon" and thought I would post it here so as not to loose it.
( RuminationsCollapse )
Current Mood: contemplative
December 20th, 2005
|12:24 pm - Gondorian|
Ha! I got it. My alter ego in the Third Age. Thanks sweetie!
Current Mood: Valorous
Current Music: Isengard theme (in my head)
June 13th, 2004
|11:01 am - This is so eerily accurate I had to post|
I know the time in between posts for me is measured by various conjunctions in the heavens (This just in R'lyeh has raised from the sea and the stars are right, in a related story Jacobite1745 has posted something in his LiveJournal...) Still with nothing more than my user name I found the personality cocktail to be so damn accurate I couldn't resist (For those of you in the know, R'lyeh has not raised from the sea, this is a test, this is only a test, had there been a real retrun of the Great Old Ones this message would have been followed by the sound of billions of people in high pitched screaming...)
|How to make a Jacobite1745|
1 part success
3 parts humour
1 part ego
Add to a cocktail shaker and mix vigorously. Add fitness to taste! Do not overindulge!